Wednesday, 14 October 2015

Fat & In It For The Fashion

 
I have been umming and arring about writing this post for a while, but I feel like now is the time to do so. I want to throw it out there that I AM FAT AND IN IT FOR THE FASHION.
 
Over the passing months, body politics has started to become a more prominent issue. Whether that be the media hating on fat people, the media hating on skinny people, fat people hating on skinny people, skinny people hating on fat people, 'average' sized people hating on either extreme etc, etc, etc. Regardless of who it comes from, it is a vicious cycle. I am so sick of seeing people digging through the remnants of every statement made to find something possibly offensive written within it. We do not need to make an issue out of every word ever written on weight, every picture ever posted of someone looking large or small - yes we need to fight for body positivity, but why can't that fight be supporting one another? Raising one another's confidence and self esteem rather than spending time tearing someone else down for wording something maybe not as they should have or posting something a little ill thought out.
 
 
Why can we not focus on complimenting and encouraging one another as a way to promote and instil body positivity? Whether you are fat, thin, in between, short, tall, black, white, Asian, whatever! You deserve to feel good about yourself! Rather than zoning in on any statement regarding weight and turning it on its head to claim it is offensive to someone, use your energy telling a friend they look ace in their new outfit, or telling a stranger you like their hair! Random acts of kindness are far more likely to change the world than hate and aggression.
 
Please don't mistake what I'm saying for complacency. If someone is consistently out of line, they should be tackled about that, but people should not be bullied and torn down based on one mistake. Debate is healthy, tackling opinions that differ to your own in a positive way is healthy, trying to educate people on the power of body positivity is healthy BUT no good can come from bullying or constantly searching for something to get on ones high horse about. We all have bad days, we are all guilty of saying something unnecessary and nasty about someone, we are all affected by things differently and sometimes we can't help but be upset by awkward mistakes people have made but we see enough sadness and deal with enough sadness personally everyday that we need to start creating reasons for people to see happiness and we are only human, PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES. We don't need to create any more reasons for people to be miserable. As cheesy and clich√© as it sounds, a smile is worth a thousand words.


 
I am fat and I got involved in blogging and Instagram etc because I fucking love fashion. I love clothes and trends and expressing myself with my outfit choices. If I see someone online, or in the street that I think looks good for whatever reason REGARDLESS of their body type, I will tell them and social media and blogging has just aided that for me. I think what I'm getting at is that I have tried my best to stay out of any spats involving body politics because I frankly, don't have the energy to waste on negativity. I don't care what your body type is, if you look great, you look great, size has nothing to do with that and we should not be making more issues for ourselves where the issue of size is concerned, not everyone is out to get us based on our body type. If someone upsets you, address it and move on, hanging on to grudges isn't good for the soul. We don't have to be on the defensive all the time. Be positive, enjoy fashion, enjoy your body, encourage others to do the same but above all be positive and be kind, you never know whose day or life you might change for the better with a kind word. A negative word has never done anything close to that and never will.
 
 
Lots Of Love,
KLJ x

8 comments:

  1. Hi Kate,

    While I appreciate your frustrations with the occasional negative turn the plus size community can take, I'm not sure your comments here add to the debate.

    I appreciate your comments about individuals (at least I trust you mean individuals) and how you tackle their body shaming, but I feel you miss a key differentiation - brands are different.

    They have a larger following for one, and the opportunity to make real change.

    You state people should spread positivity - I'd like to think I'm a rather positive spreading person - but I'm principled too. And that's why I help with @shamebodyshame - because things should be allowed to go one - and hitting companies in the pockets is probably the only way to effect change.

    Also, I trust that first image is there to show how you think these 'Warriors' act, not your own views. And for the record, i find body positive activists call out racism just as readily as body shaming.

    Kathryn x

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    1. Hi Kathryn. Thank you for this comment, I do appreciate your view. I was addressing individuals in this post rather than brands and as I stated, it is healthy to challenge opinions that differ to your own - I see absolutely no issue with that at all and yes, you are correct, the first image was used as a representation of people attacking something, for example the plus size section of the body positive community, that they do not understand. x

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  2. As Kathryn stated above; I do the think the community as a whole spreads positivity; it's been pretty awesome actually. I do think where body positivity, equality and diversity is concerned however, it's important to make an issue, and keep making an issue of it where brands are concerned, as there is a LOT more that can be done.

    In regards to individuals, yeah people are only human and people fuck up every now and again; the idea of fat people loving themselves and looking awesome while still feeling secure within themselves is still a relatively new concept to the ignorant folks out there and while they do need to be schooled, I do agree that sometimes it looks a bit bad when the WHOLE community goes gung-ho on one person. However if said person is taking the piss, then that's another story.

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    1. Hi Steph! I would absolutely never question that the community as a whole spreads positivity, 99% of the time the community is a wonderful, wonderful thing to be a part of. But as I said, I wasn't addressing brands in this post because I do agree that they could go a lot further to promote diversity and equality and brands in general are a different beast all together. That is 100% the point I was making that humans are humans and we make mistakes but that doesn't mean we should be destroyed for that reason :). x

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  3. Totally understand!! Sometimes it can get a bit daunting when people aer attacked.

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    1. For sure and that was what I was trying to get across :), that the mob mentality can sometimes be a negative x

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  4. YASSSS!!

    I try my darnest to stay out of spats. I am in it for the fashion as well, to spread confidence and share resources as a way to build each other up.

    But as I was reminded recently, every 'community' has it's bullying assholes that feel they should be heard louder than everyone else because they "ARE RIGHT" and eff everyone else for not standing with them, speaking with them, thinking like them and attacking other individuals within the community with them.

    Some people want to watch the world burn. I myself would much rather plant flowers of self confidence.

    <3

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    1. 'Some people want to watch the world burn. I myself would much rather plant flowers of self confidence' this is the most adorable quote ever, YES! x

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